1. Did believing you could play this only once impact how you made decisions?
Not really, the hardest decision for me in the whole game was probably deciding whether to bring up the tough conversation now or later. Everything else was either a no-brainer for me or just felt like the best option.
2. What do SAL and Ash look like in your mind? Did you mentally assign a gender to either or both characters?
The image of Ash in my mind was constantly changing and shifting. It honestly shocked me that, despite them being described as aesthetically attractive, I found myself picturing them in ways that I wouldn't find subjectively attractive (not my type, basically). Other than that, the strongest image in my mind when thinking about Ash was the image of bright, white light reflecting from their glasses while the rest of their face was nearly a shadow. Their dimples are only visible as shadows cast by the light of SAL's monitor.
For SAL, I pictured an old computer from the 90s. The white boxy ones that are older than me. I sorta forgot about the wires, but considering the whole game played out in a very dark room in my mind, I don't think you'd really be able to see much of the wires anyway. And with the description of SAL's sight and eyes, I kind of pictured SAL's monitor as displaying one eye that takes up the whole screen and communicates where they're looking as their only form of nonverbal communication. Like, they have no mouth to smile, but you can tell they're listening from the way their eye stares. It walks the line between an innocent, wide-eyed wonder and a cold, emotionless gaze. The only time the eye isn't on screen is when they're considering/computing something. Then it was a loading screen; sometimes a rotating circle, sometimes a spinning hourglass.
Like I said before, Ash was constantly changing in my mind's eye and that included their gender, but they mostly remained neutral or non-binary. SAL was static and sort of agender, as I thought of them either as a machine that wouldn't identify with a gender or more like a child who wasn't raised with strict gender roles in mind, and therefore it's not a part of their identity yet. If at all, maybe a slight tilt towards masculinity, but I suspect that's just because I was playing the game through their point of view and therefore projected a bit of my own identity onto the character.
3. What choices did you make? How did your game end?
I chose not to beat around the bush and begin talking about SAL's suspicion that they aren't capable of loving Ash. In the end, we decided to see where things go after discussing how relationships are forged through many small breaks and connections, ultimately leading to either the great break-up or the great connection.
4. What did you like and dislike about this game?
I didn't particularly feel super emotional throughout the playthrough, which isn't necessarily a bad thing considering the subject matter, tone, and length.
There were a few moments where I felt some real chemistry between Ash and SAL, but I feel that the game could carry a little more emotional weight if there were a few more moments like that. But again, I think that's more a result of the length and tone rather than a real flaw.
I really enjoyed the examination of love and relationships. Not sure if that conversation happens on other paths, but as someone who's always struggled to grasp relationships and being involved with another person, I thought it was really helpful and profound in its understanding of what a healthy relationship looks like.
Like I said, I've always struggled to grasp how relationships are possibly supposed to work out. Juggling between the unrealistic fantasy of a perfect romance and the cold, hard facts of romance and love that border on nihilistic anxiety is hard. Especially when you don't have a lot of experience with relationships in general *cough cough*.
All that to say that I really connected with SAL. Sure, I'm not a totally logical machine, but I am the type to be attracted to someone and immediately think stuff like "all relationships are statistically likely to fail" and "the chances that your first through third or fourth relationships work out are astronomically low." I have absolutely no faith in myself or others so taking risks like trusting people and myself- specifically trusting them and me enough to date them- is a really big deal for me. I really liked being able to play the game from the point of view of a character that feels it is incapable of love because, even if it's for a different reason than my own, I empathize with that feeling of being uncertain of yourself and wanting what's best for the person you care about. Especially when you're scared that doing what's best for them will still hurt them in the end.
5. How did this game make you feel?
Like I said, not too heavy for me emotionally. I empathized with SAL and Ash's perspectives on love and relationships resonated with me. Overall I was entertained but I'm not sure if I could play a game like this if it was much longer.
I was still pretty positive at the end. Happy or content aren't quite the words for it. Maybe hopeful, because of the message I walked away with. Maybe satisfied, because I felt like I'd learned something.
Edit after answering question 7: I felt calm and comfortable. The way the characters communicated clearly and without malice or abundant anxiety at the end made me feel that it didn't matter where they ended up because they'd be okay.
6. Do you want to see these characters again? What would you want to see in a follow-up?
Honestly, I'm not super invested in the characters themselves outside of the scenario they're in. Heck, I'm not sure that I even want to replay the game. I personally like the conversation I saw and the ending I got. Anything outside of that may be better, or it may ruin the image I have of both of them in my head. I'm content keeping the way I see both of these characters the way I last saw them.
7. What predictions do you have for SAL and Ash's relationship? Where do you see it going?
I like the open ending and have no predictions. In my mind, this is one of those games that is better without a concrete "yes" or "no" answer to the questions its ending leaves. Like I said, hopeful might be a way to describe how I felt about the ending. But I wasn't necessarily hopeful that they'd stay together, nor was I hopeful that they would break up. I was hopeful that either way, they would both be okay. Be it alone or together, they'll be okay.
8. Any other things you want to mention?
Neet game. Comfy, profound, and educational in a way.