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“I want to ensure a full, hard, solo bunk” and “torqued a damn syllable tighter” is Backstroke of the West tier translation train wreck. Maybe I need to check out this demo.

The idea of Spencer just sleepwalking out of the morgue back to his dorm without anyone noticing is pretty hilarious.

You’ve made my day! It’s so good to hear from you again. I can’t wait for the release. I also love the “Punished Spencer.” It’s appropriate.

This is my favorite VN that is actually complete, and it’s really complete, too. There is so much depth and mystery in the different paths.

I suppose its complexity works against its mainstream appeal. The relationships develop much more organically than the typical “choose your boyfriend” pattern of the typical multipath VN.

(BTW, you should consider doing furry VN reviews on youtube. Your comments and criticism are always on point.)

I am happy for you for getting your money’s worth at college. In the US English/Literature programs are often not very good, but it sounds like your program is serious. I bet you’ll get lots of ideas for your VN while reading and writing other things.

<spoiler>

Tod and Ian's assumption that cloning/teleportation would fail because "souls can neither be moved nor copied that way" is also exactly the sort of objection St. Thomas Aquinas would have made to a 12th century University of Paris teleportation project.

I can't recommend Polar Night strongly enough. It's complete enough for a satisfying playthrough. The characters are especially well developed and interesting, particularly the painfully timid wolf electrician (whom I'm afraid would have freaked out and chain smoked the whole time in FbW). Allowing for taste, I don't think I've seen such masterful art in a VN, and the writing is also top-grade.

Along with 9:22 and FbI, it's one of the three VN's I really care about and feel good about recommending.

Thanks so much for the update!

There is so much British history...I hope you don't feel too overwhelmed. The thing about the Olympic medals and fashion seems downright cruel, though.

I must not have heard about what other readers were saying about Day 7. I hope you don't make changes unless you're sure they're what you want. Every writing update I've seen has been an improvement, so it's clear you know what you're doing.

Actually, that's pretty amazing...there's never been a moment where I felt "oh no, they're wrecking the [art//character/plot}!" Probably having done so much writing before you started really made the difference.

I especially love the way you wrote Felix's relationship with his family. It's so warm and relatable. HIs dad is fantastic. "Good! I can just immediately throw you in the shower then!" made me laugh so hard. I was just a bit sorry that he jumped to school so quickly. I would have been glad to spend more time with Felix's family over the whole drive to his college.

This was a lot of fun, even though I didn't know most of the characters.

I was sorry Garret from *Polar Night* didn't make an appearance, but I don't think he would have had a good time so it's probably just as well.

Best of all was seeing more of Jeffrey and the alt-universe where Caijoru and Meimaru are real bros. Yes, I'm glad to remember them like this.

Blake is a dour Puritan:  First: Law on Sabbath, Wards and Arms

Parker is moderately masculine:  Gender: 2 men, 1 woman

Sean is a female archetype:  Gender: all the women

Marshall knows too much:  Fear: has a face when you know the truth.

Caleb is lonely and self-destructive:  Love: greed, lies, criticism -- Fear: means openness to people and friends.

Benji is reassuringly normal:  Sexuality: I am happy -- Likes: cooking, meeting new people and sex.

Spencer's paranoia about his sexuality, thoughts about hell, and 9:22's angsty, chaste vibe make it, intentionally or not, the most (only?) Catholic furry VN I've ever played.

It's so easy to imagine Spencer brooding over whether you can sin in a lucid dream, or how every priest he confesses to seems to instantly know he's gay.

Same.

I think the route would have felt a lot more natural if the romance had been left out. So far, the story has been showing two lonely guys becoming best friends. Turning that into a romance either needs to be done later or set up with alternate paths earlier in the game.

Zander's big character development is discovering how much he needs and loves Redline as a friend. As written his romantic feelings feel like a crush. They're too sudden and weaken the impact of their evening together.

This story starts out very strong. All the technical aspects of the VN are top-tier: art, menus, music, formatting, editing. Marcus is a terrific character and his relationship with Tomasz has the strongest writing in the story. The opening is mysterious and exciting.

[spoiler]

After that, the story seems to lose direction. The relationship of Tomasz with his father doesn't feel real--they seem more like roommates. You'd never guess that Tomasz lost his mom if the story didn't spell it out. The scene with the fox woman at the store seems pointless, and Tomasz seems oddly nonchalant about the gangster-ish guys looking for a friend. I'd expect him to be scared and on the phone instantly to try to figure out who they were & what was going on.

There's a jarring genre-shift with the appearance of Dawid. We know Tomasz has mental problems and severe anxiety and several scary/overwhelming things have happened/are happening to him all at once. I'd expect him to be very suspicious or distant about Dawid's sudden reappearance, but instead he instantly turns into the protag of a (perfectly good) dating sim.

It feels like Tomasz is the focus of too many different narrative threads at once. The character gets no breathing room to develop because the story is constantly dragging him into yet a new plot. 

Hopefully with greater length and more editing, most of these issues will naturally resolve themselves.

I just wanted to comment that long, serious critical reviews like this are something that furry VN's really need to improve and mature as a genre.

I just wish they weren't usually buried in long comment threads.

I thought about this some more, since I think I normally wouldn't like reluctant protagonists either. I relate easily to Garret because I can see why he's so conflicted. He's torn between family duty to give his sick and not-entirely rational mother some peace, his own opinion that the expedition is pointless, and his justified hatred for his brother. He feels stuck in a job he doesn't want.

He's also a walking, furry, deadly weapon, and everyone knows it. Despite his timid nature, even much larger animals regard him as a physical equal and see him as the obvious go-to for the very confrontations he hates so much.

I think the author did an especially good job of using hints and cryptic flashbacks to show why Garret is the way he is. He's seething with repressed rage. He's visibly and lastingly maimed by the same person he's risking his life to follow, for the sake of what sounds like a dysfunctional family relationship. He's more scared of himself than anything.

This is a setup for a really intense character arc, so I think you still might want to keep an eye on the updates.

This is all really good advice for young authors. Writing effortless-sounding dialog is really hard.

And one of the biggest challenges is learning to evaluate criticism and knowing when it applies to what you're trying to do and is helpful, or when it isn't and should be politely ignored.

Your second-to-last paragraph sums up your problem with PN. You can't stand Garret's character because he's a reluctant protag. That's fair enough, but it doesn't make PN a mediocre VN.

 The MC makes it clear from the beginning that he doesn't want to be there, but feels he has to for his mom. He really, really hates confrontations but also wants to do the right thing. He's constantly conflicted and isn't enthusiastic about any of the choices he makes up to this point.

As you noted, the one exception is when he can fall back into his professional identity during the electrical crisis. Then he's calmly assertive and decisive.

Garret is a really well-written reluctant protag, and I enjoy tagging along with him and trying to figure him out, at most nudging the reluctant wolf one way or another. I understand not being able to stand this sort of character, but that doesn't make the VN mediocre.

Wow. This was a treat. Thanks so much for writing all this out! It's easy to wait for FbI updates when you give us so much to think about.

{Spoiler: Armchair psychology}

I think Ted is a thoughtful and believable portrayal of a guy with borderline personality disorder and an abusive background. He doesn't believe anyone can truly care for him and that the only way he can survive is by using and manipulating others. His feelings of emptiness and loneliness are so intense that to escape them he feels justified in doing things he would consider horrible under other circumstances.

We see in several of the paths that Ted is capable of change. It is something of a revelation for him to discover that Daren and the others really care about Colin and Colin really cares about him. If Colin or his friends push him in the right ways, Ted is willing to give up his original plan and be more trusting and less selfish.

The writing between Jeffrey and Daren is so strong in this route, and the last dream with Caijoru was fantastic.

So much happens with Ted and Jeffrey's characters towards the end that I feel that the game ends a bit too soon. After such an intense climax, you could take your time showing how the characters' new lives settle out.

I think this is the strongest ending so far, and FbI's writing is getting better and more refined with every update.

I don't think you should worry about that bug. Most VN authors don't even have forwards compatibility for saves.

I've never heard of anyone expecting a save from a newer version to open under an older version. Even theoretically there's no reason that should work without a dedicated parser. It's more than enough that you tested it with old save files.

Be sure she knows not to copy anything to the problem drive or create any new files on it. You don't want to risk overwriting clusters that might still contain recoverable data.

I second that, Xarishro. I've done data recovery, and you should always ask around before giving up. In some cases, it's surprisingly easy for someone who knows how.

I also strongly urge all creatives to have an off-site cloud backup, or at least a USB flash drive backup. The best online services cost money and are bulletproof, but there are free services (Onedrive, Dropbox) that will give you some space for valuable assets.

It's amazing how refreshing and unusual it is to play as an MC with an actual personality and realistic competence in some plot-relevant area.

Something I especially love about *Polar Night* is that your characters have real species characteristics, and you integrate them naturally throughout the story. Garret's teeth are real weapons and recognized as such. He struggles to control his instinctual body language, and is acutely aware of the other characters' scents. The reader gets a real sense of how icky he feels after sweating in his fur under heavy winter clothes, or the stiffness in his tail. Not to mention your vivid, visceral portrayal of his eye condition.

Garret's deep discomfort with aggression and fear of escalation are among his most interesting character traits, and they wouldn't be nearly as effective if he were just a 'furry human,' rather than a bipedal wolf who despite his low-key demeanor, has a body and instincts specifically designed to kill.

Good job with the redesign. I agree this character was just 'there' and the art wasn't bad, but just felt like a placeholder. My only complaint is that the folds and shadows on his coat look weird--too much like he's wearing polygons.

I hope you find someplace to post 9:22 fan art, though. That was always fun to see on your twitter account.

9:22 as a Catholic paranormal furry VN:

Spencer: "I suppose it was only a matter of time until my priest found out about my love for cock."

Todd: "Evil shit. We're thinking we're dealing with a demon, if that tells you anything."

Ian's car is full of saint medals, one which was blessed by a pope, and a third-class relic from a minor saint.

I'm not sure how I found this game, but I'm sure glad I did.

The writing is sharp and focused, and Garret is both likable and mysterious.

 I especially appreciate that Garret doesn't have VN MC disease (rambling endlessly about every possible thought, feeling or observation without conveying any sense of a personality.)

I was worried when so many new characters appeared so fast, but they all are so well developed it was easy to get to know them and tell them apart. Stefan is great.

The art and layered sprites are a lot better looking and more dynamic than what I'm used to. I'm sure looking forward to future updates.

Kidney stones are horrible. I hope they all go away and never return.

Thanks a lot for the update, and please continue to take care of yourself.

It's possible that lifting dumbbells or other forearm exercises might help with your wrists (depending on the cause of course).

I replayed the game and I think I figured out what was confusing me about Spencer and Ian. The writing is very subtle in a good way. I noticed a lot of little things I missed.

I like the way Spencer doesn't ever give infodumps to the reader. He tells us what he's thinking at the moment, period. He always knows what he means, but he's not going to spell it out to us.

[spoiler/plot question for other players]

What's all the weird drama about the Freeman Run, and what's the relation to Ian's tail problem? Was Andrew hinting that Ian had a boner around Spencer? (and Andrew was paying attention despite leading the run and giving speeches--what a creep!) What's the relation with Andrew's remarks about Ian's tail? The dialogue in this VN is very good but also very cryptic at times.

This game has a very exciting plot and the characters are terrific. The art style is unique and really appealing. There's a great sense of mystery and hidden menace under the superficially normal college problems. Spencer is a fascinating and mysterious protagonist and has tremendous personality. It's great fun to see the story through his eyes.

BTW, Spencer's cosmic dream hammock scene nearly made me fall off my chair. It was such a great image of how he was experiencing the moment, and so funny, cute, and relatable. (I think it's the only time we see him relaxed and comfortable looking--poor guy.) The scenes showing how Spencer experiences anxiety are superb as well. Please don't hold back if you have other opportunities to use Spencer's first-person headspace perspective. It really works.

This is an excellent game. The core characters are really well-written and the plot is very engaging. It was a great idea to give Jeffery such a large range of expressions. He really comes across as a fully animated, living character with constantly shifting emotions. Daren is such a great bro.

I was also very impressed by your realistic portrayal of mental illness in a obviously flawed and self-destructive yet lovable main character.