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You're not! The way you're seeing it is perfectly fine, some people care about it more than others and neither are really wrong- for example, i use it/its pronouns because that's just what makes me feel happiest but i don't mind if people call me by something else while done people would care a lot more.  My pronouns are more like an aspect of me vs a representation of my whole identity

a lot of people use pronouns as an extension of their identity, while some people care about it less; from my perspective, its mostly just about being able to present yourself in a way that makes you happy and comfortable :)