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The story has potential and the characters are interesting enough, but as someone already mentioned, a proof reader is desperately needed.


I didn't mean for this comment to be all about negatives or issues but I made a list as I played through. I'm sure there are others I've missed, especially as I've yet to finish all the content but I hope it helps.

Minor bugs or typos I noticed:

  • Even though I'm playing in English, when going to lunch with your coworker, it says "Alguns minutos depois..."
  • Later when you're done having lunch and are leaving your coworker it says "em casa..."
  • After reading the letter left by our landlord the screen says "No dia seguinte a tarde"
  • Ancestral Mor shouts "Chega!!!" at our character instead of whatever is meant to be said in English. Translator says it means "He arrives" but I'm unsure if that's what's meant here. Maybe "I'm here!!!", I think?
  • When talking about how MC died Ancestral Mor says "I had a very impressive fall", I think they're meant to say "You had a very impressive fall"
  • After MC finishes "their" work and is told that dinner is done the transition says "Alguns emails depois"
  • After MC finishes eating dinner he goes to tidy up the kitchen for a few hours then thinks "Mom was so worried that she remembered to tidy up in the kitchen", I think it's meant to say that she forgot to. Otherwise what were we doing for those few hours?
  • MC later thinks "For her mother to be sleeping like this, it must be very hot today, or she tried something with her father and he just rejected her" would make more sense if the first and second "her" was removed.
  • Once MC goes to talk a walk the transition screen once again says "Alguns minutos depois..." and when returning home from that walk the transition says "Em casa..."
  • When on the bus to meet with Blue Moon MC thinks "The mother is very thoughtful" instead of "Mother is very thoughtful"
  • When MC and family go shopping it says "In the shopping", center or mall is missing. Also when MC says "And I'm going to start..." "...por there." instead of "over there"
  • When MC goes to buy a family car the transition screen says "On the concessionarium"
  • After buying a car and going home, despite Fuuka being asleep in the car she has her hand up like she's also on her phone
  • MC thinks "And I still have to convince my father to leave for a week with his family so that the renovation can go ahead" should be "our family"
  • When receiving a text from the dealership woman he thinks "Yes, the concersionary girl, I think I'd better answer that"
  • When first replying to the text from the dealership woman she's first labeled as "Blonde MILF" then it suddenly changes to "Cute Blonde". She's also using MC's profile picture/icon instead of her own/the one we see before responding to her
  • When separating at school, Aika says "Well then, I'll wait for you near your office" but MC doesn't have an office, he's a student just like Aika. Perhaps classroom was meant instead?
  • When talking to MC Eri says "He didn't text me, he didn't come to visit me..." would make more sense to replace "He" with "You" since she's talking about MC and not some other guy
  • When done having sex MC tells her how Eri how her pussy is delicious and she says "And your father is still delicious" I think this is a typo? Genuinely unsure what she means here, unless she's actually interested in MC's father
  • After the Bitcoin email when examining the dresser MC says "Amario que mae guarda algumas roupas e outras coisas, no vou mexer nisso" instead of the English equivalent
  • When Aika isn't at school MC thinks "Nothing here, I'll have to go to his office" pretty sure that's also meant to be classroom
  • When MC calls for an ambulance to save Eri he says "I'm here Erin, I'm here" instead of her name. Unless it actually is Erin and the previous times were all typos?
  • When MC approaches Jun asking her to check her email she says "Well, what would I have here apart from several spans?" should be "apart from spam"
  • Once Jun gets up one of her employees says "The rest room is on the other side, ma'am" I think that's meant to be meeting room, or conference room. She then also says "Hahaha, confuse me" I think she's trying to say that she was confused? 
  • After MC says goodbye to the kid in the park the transition screen says "Alguns minutos depois, em casa..."
  • After striking a deal with Suzu, when MC goes to contact the construction company the phone still thinks we're talking to Eri. The construction companies profile picture is also the same as ours
  • When approaching Chiyoko and her daughter she shouts "PARE!!!!" instead of the English equivalent
  • Looking in the "My Harem" menu there's a set of twins called "Gemeas Segurancas" instead of the English equivalent
  • When MC moves and later contacts Jun the conversation between him on the construction company is still there instead of just the conversation with Jun
  • The conversation with Jun is still present despite us talking to (presumably) the construction company. They're still using our profile picture as well
  • When MC bribes the bouncer to also look after his bike the bouncer says "Closed!" instead of "Deal!"
  • When MC is having sex with the new girl at the club when she says she's on a safe day, MC will say "Making fun!!!" instead of "I'm cumming!" or whatever they're meant to be saying
  • Maybe I missed it but one moment MC enters the shed/bunker/thing in his backyard using his fingerprint, the next moment he's suddenly using a card to enter it
  • When MC is talking to the maid she mentions employees, MC asks "Waitresses?" instead of maids. The maid then agrees with MC mentioning that they're maids
  • When MC says "I promise to spend a few days with you both" for some reason Chiyoko says "I'll collect" no clue what she's meant to be saying here
  • When we catch MC's dad at the club he mentions MC being attracted to "her (mom) and her sisters", as far as I'm aware we haven't met any of MC's mother's sisters? Then he says "this attraction between brothers and mothers" but, again as far as I'm aware, MC doesn't have a brother?
  • Again when using the phone our conversation with the construction company is still there instead of just our conversation with Jun
  • Fuuka says to mom "You've got guts, Mom, to talk to your brother about it" but she was talking to MC. Not our mother's brother, if she has one.
  • Dad says "I hope his wife doesn't find out" presumably he's talking about mom instead of "his wife"?
  • After Rin leaves there's some more phone shenanigans where our conversation with Jun appears with the construction company. They're still using our profile picture.
  • Jun mentions their dinner was "already in the fire" instead of (I assume) "already in the oven". Maybe on the stove since it looks like soup
  • After serving dinner there's still an equals sign as Jun says "Here="
  • Moments later Jun seemingly talks to herself? Or at least stills MC's lines. After MC says "Absolutely" she just says things for 15 lines. A few of which seems like what MC is meant to be saying? "I'm back, with the wine, how do I know you want it?", "No, I don't want to, thank you for offering", "Hehe I knew you wouldn't want to". All said by Jun.
  • An equal sign is forgotten when MC takes a both "I mean, you're my mother="

Those are translation errors, which will be fixed in the next update.

Cool, and again wasn't trying to knock your story. Something of this size and complexity is bound to have things happen. Keep up the good work.