I'm trans in the opposite direction, but I've had similar experiences. It's impossible to talk about, because of the shame and the feeling that it was all my fault, that I chose to do it. This game was like a mirror for me. Knowing that other people have this experience of shame and blaming themselves and still are able to accept that it was traumatizing was just so validating. I definitely cried while playing it, and wrote down some of my favorite quotes. Thank you so much for making this, and I'm sorry. I wish healing and happiness for you.
Viewing post in He Fucked the Girl Out of Me. comments
I'm compelled to write this to hopefully help, but I'm not sure if it feels condescending or redundant. I don't share an experience like the game's, just some relatively minor sexual trauma. Worried that my perspective is unhelpful as a result. But I think the potential for a positive effect makes this worth posting anyway. Sorry if this is unhelpful (and for how late this reply is).
For circumstances like the game depicts, I don't think it's accurate to view this kind of thing as a choice that someone made. Personal or impersonal, there's a lot of coercion going on which warps consent. Having the choice between dysphoric misery and a chance at change isn't much of a choice, especially if there's an influence like Sally to "softly onboard" someone, convince them that it'll be fine. Doesn't mean accountability doesn't exist, but 100% lucid decisionmaking is far from a given in a tumultuous life. Desperation and fear and exploitative systems can and do coerce, and their blame should not be placed upon oneself. Be kind to yourself.