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I think this one did a good job of walking the line between being bad but playable and unplayably horrendous. The music is almost acceptable, but then throws some earbleed in. The graphics are... not good. The broken controls, camera, and minimap are bad, but the game is still playable. It's kind of fun, even. I did fail to beat the boss, though, as it's a very finicky thing that requires fine control the broken (or "broken"?) controls don't allow.

I still have no idea why the numbers are counting up in the upper left corner, or what all the text over the player means.

Wow are you a shitty games analyst? This is a surprisingly in depth write up.
You hit it on the head with bad but playable, I wanted to make a game that was totally beatable, not ridiculously frustrating, but horrible in every way.
The text over the player is the speed and direction of the player, which I didn't need to know, I just put it there because I thought it'd be funny. And the number counting up was so I could test whether the "cutscenes" were the right length and make adjustments. Then I left it in because it's funnier that way.

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Professional-ish game developer, plus years of experience both playing and making weird, broken, janky games.

I suspected the numbers were some sort of debug thing deliberately left in but wasn't sure.