Skip to main content

Indie game storeFree gamesFun gamesHorror games
Game developmentAssetsComics
SalesBundles
Jobs
TagsGame Engines
(+1)

I enjoyed the way almost each click qualified the tone of the initial verse your reader saw -- the I met with a few friends. It did us a lot of good. made me smile, and the doublethink regarding your house cleaning/sleeping was also really cute. There were times during this jam when I also felt like I wouldn't/couldn't end up submitting something, and the way this poem unfolds reminds me that -- yeah, it's the doing of something (even if it's not what you intended or have set as your goal) that matters. I'm glad you ended up submitting this!

Experimentation - I gave this a 2 because I selfishly (especially in light of the poem's topic) wanted more! Haha. I'm no stranger to poems where clicking on the words changes their meaning, but I love how that qualified your feelings and showed us your thought process here. I wonder if (in new versions of the piece, should you make any) you could take this even farther -- ex., randomizing what each click leads to, so that your audience gets a new spread of thoughts and emotions on each read, as well as a sense of how arbitrary our day-to-day feelings can be.

Interactivity - The poem unfolds through the reader's clicks, but it unfolds the same way each time. I think it would pack more of a punch if it were a little different with each read. For that reason, I gave this category a 3.

Polish - I feel like you've nailed the content but (reiterating the gist of what I've written above) that the form could get into its nooks and crannies a little more, so I also gave this a 3. (I think you might also have a typo in one line -- "I once angain.")

Poetry - Definitely a poem, so 5!

(+1)

woah thank you for the thourough review :)

I think I'm going to leave this piece as it is, it's my journal of thoughts about this jam when I decided to abandon doing anything and poemified in an interactive way and I admit that I did't give it much more thought other than the fact that I once again had the energy and  the willing to create something/anything  ^^'
but your feedback defnitely gives me ideas on how to implement similar-but-diffrent poems in the future :)
especially given that confronted with the same situation our feelings change, and interactive poem can convey that.  also I think of how music and visuals could help express emotions better. it's true that with interactivity it's possible to go a long way further.