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"I think he already knows you can't keep it." 

"Hawks, just-Just stop it. I know I can't protect him, I just.. don't want to let go.. I can't just.. let him go, and never be able to see him again..-"

"...." 

(FINALLY I CAN JUST COME BACK. ;W;)

"....He's my everything, Hawks. I mean it, do you even know why I'm so keen on staying with Lukas?.. To make sure nothing ever comes to harm him?....Of course you don't, You literally never once listened to my own reasons for this."

"...Go ahead." 

".. He just.. reminds me of someone I used to know. Not know, actually. Used to love, and care for like I try to do as much with Lukas......Their... gone now.. all because of me never doing anything to make sure they were okay.."

The once held-up guard, was now.. nothing but a slightly hunched over shinsou, his eyes trailing down to the grass as well, he even sounded upset-..

"...I-I couldn't, do anything to stop what happened that day.. I couldn't do anything to make sure they didn't do something they shouldn't have-Which they did-!......I-It's my fault for remembering t-them like this, my fault for being so attached to Lukas, but what am I supposed to do about it..-?!"

"Listen, I-....." 

He sighed 

"I...might have a solution." 

"...If you had a solution, you would've said i-it to begin-!!.....I'm.. I'm s-sorry, hawks.. L-Look, I'm just.. I'm just having a damn whatever m-moment right now, and whatever idea you have.. please.. tell me-. I didn't.. mean to yell at you earlier, I was just.....-sigh-.., I'm just rambling at this point..-"

At that moment, Lu started to wake up 

"M-Mn...wh...?"

".. Wh-, Jesus.. Look we'll, we'll talk when we s-start heading back, alright hawks?.. Or, when he goes back to sleep.. one of the two."