Thank you again!
Fixed everything except the "I thrust my cock balls deep inside and" since
"I thrust my cock and balls deep inside and" makes it sound like he's thrusting his balls inside too.
"I thrust my cock, balls deep, inside and" Sounds okay to me too, but if you think the phrase itself sounds odd or confusing I'll consider changing it to something completely different.
Ahhh, for some reason I was reading that as "cock balls", haha. I like your second example better than what I had put but now that I'm reading it differently it makes a lot more sense. It's highly possible I might be mistaken with some of these screenshots so I won't take any offense if you keep things as they are :)
Anyways, last batch for today, I promise. I've been powering through the game on a mission to 100% it. I played the Japanese version but given that I can't read or speak Japanese there was only so much I could accomplish, so it's a much more enjoyable experience this time around!
Hahaha yeah "cock balls" does sound pretty odd. And don't worry, I don't think you're mistaken and I really appreciate telling me all the typos and giving me your opinion. If there's something I don't want to change right away, like this time, I'll explain it so I can get some feedback and improve the quality of the translation.
I'm glad to hear you're enjoying the game and thank you for letting me know about all these typos!
I'll fix them and give a more detailed reply later today or tomorrow, thanks again for all the feedback!
Last round! I believe I have completed everything, all scenes / CG and bestiary unlocked and I went through the alternate ending. Great game and great localization, after the art I feel like the pacing is the second best part of this game. Rarely did I find myself grinding without any new scenes either 1) able to be unlocked or 2) imminent as I progressed.
The art is amazing though, there are a lot of great artists but illustrators who are both skilled and have a distinct style that you can immediately recognize are far more rare. Top notch stuff!
Again, great work and great choice of a game to localize. I hope it proves to be a success for you and I look forward to seeing more from HappyHand!
Thank you again and sorry for the late reply! Fixing the typos is a no-brainer, but here's what I think of the other things you mentioned.
A.And it was inevitable. I cum. I just cum unsightly.
B.And it was inevitable. I came.
I came so shamefully.
A.I get horny right away and tonight too, (context?)
B.As expected, he's way more skilled now
since it's his second time doing this.
I get horny right away and, tonight too,
when Ike-san milks me with his whole body,
I orgasm while spilling milk out
A.[Cow]
B.[cow] *If that's what you meant, neither has heard a cow before and the [] are there to empathize the word.
A.spilled out his grudges(?)
B.spilled out his... grudges? *It was like A in Japanese, she's just stating what he did while questioning if what he did was just because of his grudges towards her. B works(?) too.
A.Being roughly fucked from behind feels
especially "I'm being used like an object"
and it's so amazing.
B.Being roughly fucked from behind feels
particularly "I'm being used like an object"
and it makes me so ecstatic.
C.Being roughly fucked from behind feels
like I'm being used like as an object and
it's so amazing.
D.Being roughly fucked from behind makes me
feel like I'm being used like an object and
it makes me so ecstatic. *I like D the most but, if you think it's terrible then feel free to let me know!
A.beat the cock...
B.beat the cock... *It's a meme/joke. There's just this joke of saying "can't beat the cock" since it's a saying, staple in Japanese adult games/doujins, when girls just can't win against it resulting them or other people saying that "Yup, no one can beat the cock" or "I couldn't beat the cock..." or "I couldn't win against the cock..." and so on. In Japanese he does say "she can't even beat cock", but there's no plural for it so it's either "can't even beat a cock" or "can't even beat cocks" and it uses the specific phrase that's used for "can't beat the cock" so I decided to go with that. If you still think it's silly/wrong then I guess I could change it.
If I missed anything please let me know and I'll reply back!
Congrats on finishing the game and I'm glad to hear you enjoyed it! Yeah, when I saw the game the first time I fell in love with the art style instantly. I just HAD TO make this the first game I publish. Thank you and I hope everyone will enjoy it as much as you did! Thank you very much for all the help again, feel free to ask me if there's anything on your mind, cheers!
Hey no problem and thank you for the reply! Also I forgot to ask about this:
A."I didn't talk with you so I could order something!!!"
"You get that right, since
you've lived so pointlessly long!!"
B."I didn't talk with you so I could order something!!!"
"You got that, right, since
you've lived so pointlessly long!!"
*You got that right, just sounds odd to me because the way she says it, you get that, right?
*You get that right, just sounds odd to me because the way she says it, you got that, right?
*Like that, but if I'm wrong or you think got is better please let me know!
I'm glad the rest looked good and I changed the like to as , but man maybe I should look for an editor since there was quite a lot of errors, in my opinion anyway.
Thank you for going through the trouble of reporting all this to me! I really appreciate it and feel free to ask if there's anything I can do in return or if you have any questions!
Aha, I may have been interpreting that conversation incorrectly then! I was reading it as something along the lines of 'you are correct' as opposed to 'you understand this?'. I don't think I have a save file preceding that conversation so that I can look at it in context of the whole but it's definitely possible I misinterpreted it.
Actually I think your translation work was excellent, consider how many lines of text there are between dialogue/ items / missions / combat text / etc. and how few errors there were in the grand scheme of things! I tried my hardest to find some little scrap of untranslated Japanese text tucked into some minor dialogue or item description within the game but was pleased to be unsuccessful, haha.
I know in the past when I've written papers it can be amazing how something you've read over countless times can have a seemingly glaring error (or more often than not, errors ) until someone with a "fresh" set of eyes proofreads it. I am by no means a master of English grammar, but I have been a voracious reader my whole life so I rely a lot on instinct when something catches my eye and looks off or reads oddly.
Feel free to give me a shout if you'd ever like an extra pair of eyes to look over something, I like that you plan to focus on games with actual gameplay elements as opposed to VNs (which are good, but to be honest a lot of the time I find myself holding down the ctrl or shift key to blast through the text). Games like Branded Azel break up that feeling of monotony with RPG combat, crafting and so on which I find to be far more engaging! Also as I mentioned before, choosing this game to release proves you to be a man of culture so if I can help aid you in your good work in any way and ensure more quality releases like this one, I would be happy to do so.
Ah, I see, yeah it's more of 'you understand this?'. I can hook you up with the whole scene later.
Thank you very much! And yeah, I tried pretty hard so that it's 100% translated hahaha.
I don't read that much myself, but yeah I really need to get other people to go through the scripts from now on, can't just rely on myself since I can improve the quality of the translation with other people's help, like this time.
Oh thank you for the offer! i would feel bad if I asked you to go through the scripts for free, but I contacted you in Steam so let's see what we can come up with. Yeah VNs are nice, but I just really love gameplay features like puzzles, crafting, adventuring, leveling up and finding a secret room inside a secret room is basically the best thing ever for me hahaha.
Yeah I just had to go with this game first, love at first sight. Thank you again for the offer to help! I would be very happy if you could go through my scripts, but like I said, it would feel wrong asking you to do it for free. Let's chat more in Steam and I hope we'll get along for a long time!