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(+1)

Definitely a very poetic work of prose. This work was not in my preferred style of writing or storytelling, fyi, so take my comments for whatever you wish them to be worth.

I felt very uncertain, as I did not know who the speaker was, or why she was observing the (meteorite impact?) She dwells upon her cowardice, but I don't know why she thinks she's a coward, or why she might need or wish to be brave.

The narration is very detached and impersonal, even before the speaker is injured. This put a distance between her and me, and makes her seem very detached from herself - especially when she's berating herself for cowardice.

The use of 'the eye' as the final narrator is even more impersonal and alien. It served, I think, to highlight for me how the speaker has at that point passed or is passing beyond being human, in a meaningful sense, but the final paragraphs make it seem as though her death is a form of enlightenment.

On a more prosaic note, it wasn't clear what the 'unconventional weapon' even was, let alone how it figured in the narrative. Was the impact that destroys the horrible building an intentional act? If that was the intent, considering this was written for a themed jam, it might have been worthwhile sacrificing some of the poetic flow of the piece in the name of making that fact more prominent.

I too am more fond of direct prose, gritty and to-the-point action, but here we are - me writing quite a poetic story. I never liked poetry itself, I am more of a prose guy. But it seems I can inject some of the former into the latter, it's been a while since I wrote something (I do not even remember when, perhaps some 8 years ago in an online Play-by-forum RPG session).

The whole concept suffers a bit from under-development - it lacks some bits upfront and also some bits near the end, to better explain the whole idea and give meaning to the individual actions and to the protagonist and her background. As I said in my reply to "Chimeric Creations" below, I would need to leave the story rest for a while and have another look later, especially if it is not as straightforward as other stories I read here (many of them perfect, btw!).

To spoil: the protagonist Tarlan, one of the daughters of an Eternal Dynasty's Sage, is part of a (losing) battle of a larger ED group against the Robot Legions. Previously her father was killed in that same battle (reference to her "old man at the fire" and then next to the "dead old man next to the transport drone") and she battles the feelings of cowardice, that she was not there to fight alongside him. But when she encounters a distant RL Monolith closing in, some inner sense brings the distant meteor (later meteorite, when it descends through the atmosphere) to her attention and she instantly knows THAT is how ED can deal with the Monolith as one of the remaining RL units. Admittedly, I did not talk about whether she guides it herself to the target (which would be the most logical way, given the premise of "Unconventional weapon" for this Jam) or not. This is also why she has to be so close to the impact. And even if she thought of being a coward before, after realising that she can turn the tide that her father could not, she relaxes inside and submits to the flow of events. She then reminisces about things from her past life, while slowly being killed due to the blast and herself being hurled through the forest.

Reading all I just wrote in the previous paragraph now clearly shows that more explanations and hints would be required to fully appreciate the initial story seed. Because what I have in mind is not necessarily what the reader gets form the written sentences :)

I decided to expand upon this into a longer (but still short) story, perhaps adding a page or two.