One thing I noticed that you might want to change is that when you are spying on the Rinkos once you have become Emperor, and you decide to leave them alone, there is still the line "There's no telling what Luna would do if her guards caught me…". I even Shattered her, so presumably the protagonist should not be worried about that anymore.
Also the line when looking around the East Hallway in the third act is the same as when you just add the upgrade to the manor and nobody is living there yet, which seems odd.
Hope this helps! Really excited for this new act <3