You've spoken to the right person as I do some translation of visual novels. Well I seem to remember that I've seen some typos here and there but nothing too bad.  And for the story I'll make sure to write again on Itch after playing it.

I personally like the game and i really look forward to what will happen

I guess the biggest problem is that somethings seem meaningless and aren't explained in any way makimg them feel random and confusing, but that's only because the game isn't finished 

Also some things seem to not fit, as if you tried to go into a certain direction but then decided differently in thw middle of it, i recommended that one day when you have more story and content and more importantly when you settled on the main plot and story that you rewrite some of the stuff

Of course i don't want to tell an artist how to make his art, i just try to give an idea to why people don't like the story