Nothing in the help menu seems to actually be true? Every enemy who hits me, one shots me instantly and has a ton of health that takes me anywhere from 2 to 3 dozen hits to defeat, there is no escape function, minigame, or mechanic, and once the enemy is done with me and leaves, I get softlocked and can't continue playing, my character won't get up no matter what buttons I hit. Nothing in this game actually works at all in any sort of playable state.

Press V to get your character up.

XD IT SEEMS YOUR JUST DUMB MY FRIEND BECAUSE IT WORKS PERFECTLY FINE FOR ME

Oh, it's actually a problem that there's no "V to get up" in game. I thought it's softlock too until decided to look at game page. Thanks for reminding that there's somewhere in game (in menu/on start/as a tip) should be a some sort of text tutorial or tip about that.

I completely disagree with you, it's just that either you haven't even tried all the game's functionality or you don't have the skills to play... or you just want to provoke people or a weak device, that's all

when you make the new game you can customize how strong the enemys are, the chances of items throughout the map, and a couple of other things, just change enemys difficulty to the easiest setting