Thank you so much for seeing it from the point of my view hahaha ı am very shy to talk about my emotions because ıf the opposite side claims that ım wrong about feeling them that kinda feels like a thorny ivy squeezing my throat. I guess ıts because ı feel like ı shouldnt have feel it in the first place. Of course ı cant say ı survived all the pain from my old memories but ı am trying to make them feel less strong? like trying to understand other side or saying ''we are all humans in the end'' because negative emotions always harm me in the end while the people who caused them arent even aware that ı still think about those memories XD. But being heard out is always something feels like a getting warmth of sun while walking on outside with nice weather and fresh air >w<
ahaha yaay ı love fictional characters! maybe some people may find it weird ı like to think about like talking them or adding them on my daily routine (hmm ıts like ı imagine them doing something else while ım studying lol) they also help the strengthen my self love ı think ı felt that especially on ADW because having them on your side no matter which path you choose felt so liberating ıt was like ''ıts ok even ıf ı make a mistake'' and ı think ı managed to carry this feeling into my normal life time to time.. hopefully ı can continue to do that because ı am in my exam week now hahaha ;w; when will this eeeeennnddddd.
I really hope things will take hopeful turn in this depressing sight we will somehow find new sparks of hope but ı really hope ıt will be soon XD because destruction of depressing feelings are too OP for this moment in my opinion -_-
oh and about perfection ı actually heard a term of ''perfection of imperfection'' ı guess ıt was japanese tho ı didnt really searched it much ıt was about beauty of things that are incomplete or flawed. With not knowing much ı actually tried to think about the concept myself when ı think what really matters is not being flawless from the start but being able to complete each other with your own strengths and weaknesses like day and night and they create a full day together.. they seem so different and opposite but with their existence together we are living our normal Lifes. ı guess ı think relationships closer to this.. ıts like we will be different and have our own mistakes but whats important is being able to walk together and trying to find a way to improve the problems. which sounds very difficult actually haha x3 but ı hope everyone will find their happiness with or without flaws.