Thanks for the feedback. I was trying to make him detached due to the meds, maybe it was too subtle, as with his injuries, i was trying to make it sound like it was what he overheard from the medics attending him. The problem with a word limit i suppose.
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Ah. Aha. Well that makes sense. Maybe having his speech be slower and more broken might have helped convey that feeling. Perhaps a line about how the Inquisitor is being patient with the sergeant's slurred words? That would lean into the "gentle facade over a monstrous core" thing you have going with her.