Because apparently it's offensive to want to know what an ROs gender is even if they go by NB.
Honestly that response to me indicates that you are interested in women. why are you trying to force gender on a character without gender? I'm a cis queer woman so maybe my viewpoint could do with input from people of other genders and representations, but I do believe being non binary means you don't feel you are either or any gender. So pursuing the gender of a non gendered character doesn't make sense. It just feels like you're trying to force a gender on them.
I think perhaps, this what other people might be inferring and that is why they do not like your comment. Im not psychic though, I'm not always the best at understanding some topics but I am trying. I don't mean to be insulting or argumentative either. I seek an understanding of motivations, social knowledge and academic knowledge
You are asking for their SEX not their GENDER. They are non-binary which means that even IF they were assigned female at birth (afab) they are not a woman.
And yes it is rather offensive because demanding to know their sex makes it seem like you think that genitals are more important than how they identify. Which is gross. I hope you don't treat real people like this.
As much as I want to agree. I can kinda understand where their coming from. I've been on the other end as well, of being judged for anatomy over gender so I know it sucks. But even I have things that turn me off and on of the physical side of things reguardless of the gender of the person. And I don't see how being disrespectful of that is any better than being disrespectful of someone's true gender or sexual orientation.
Personally I may be more mentally flexable with the gender of a person. More about personality for me. But no matter how much I might wish otherwise. When it comes to physical nature, I can not just on a whim, change the fact that some female parts turn me off. I don't like that it is that way, but it is what it is.
I find myself also not sure how to imagine Noah, and I hope whenever/if our characters do get to be with them physically in story, it will be writen in a way that can be flexible to imagination at least.
"And I don't see how being disrespectful of that is any better than being disrespectful of someone's true gender or sexual orientation."
Given that demanding to know a non-binary person's downstairs mixup is patently rude and can be triggering for people with body disphoria, yeah it is pretty different.
For me it's a constant reminder that I will never escape the body I was stuck with and that it will always define me in some way despite my wishes. So like, yeah, seeing shit like that fucking sucks.
Where did I say anything about 'demanding' to know a real life person's downstairs makeup.? Real life that might come about eventually in a natural way as get to know someone. We don't have that with a fictional character so much. At least right now. Also I am trans-male myself so please don't treat me like I don't know anything about triggers for dysphoria. In fact I meantioned that in my post.
Although I will admit I have limited knowledge for those non-binery gender. I try to be look at all sides though as best as I can, even though some can be difficult to understand, or I may missunderstand some things. Anyways I was just expressing what I understood.