The game is entertaining.
It does his job despite being somewhat short.
The characters are also well established, although not all of them are in-depth, but I hope to learn more about them in the future.
I think the only negative thing would be the introductory part, which was a little boring in my experience, but I suppose it must be important for some clues or to deepen the story where the events take place!
I look forward to the next update and the routes ;)
The game seems to have a premise about transsexuality.
A representation of self-acceptance and your likes.
Although the game tries to do this along with references to politics I feel that the execution is not that good.
I wouldn't be able to give some suggestions on how to improve or expand it since it's the first time I play a visual novel related to this theme, perhaps it could focus on better interaction or a broader self-discovery not only of the protagonist, but also of the character that accompanies him.
Finally, it would be to improve the grammar and make a few corrections to the text.
But still great game, but it can improve as I said.
Here my analysis regarding Bear My Breath.
I'll be honest.
The beginning was uncomfortable of read.
Because I feel like the visual novel was a combination of the story and fantasies of the own author of the game?
And that was one of the main problems that made it difficult for me to read, since the type of relationship there was with the 2 characters presented in the story felt very rushed.
Although I have a theory that this was intentional because of what the story tries to unfold in the town where these things happen.
Almost halfway through the game this takes a normal and fluid direction, which is why the visual novel ends in an acceptable way, just I feel that the ending is very rushed.
But as the description of your game says, it seems that you plan to expand it so you may fix it in the future.
In summary: It's a decent story but it needs a little polishing in the introductory part, especially with one of the characters in the story since he only appeared for a moment and was forgotten from there, and try not to combine too much the fantasies that I mentioned earlier since it felt a little strange to read, maybe reduce it or give a good development of how this love story originates.
That's all I can say, improve your project and see you in the next update for a new rate!
Alright. I will try to be as objective as possible to help you improve as far for the future of your project.
1. Grammar: You need to polish it a lot. I have been noticing many deficiencies in this topic mostly due to the lack of capital letters and punctuation.
Another issue could be the colors of the character names. I think this may be due to the use of the blank text box, since the name of the characters can vaguely be displayed at least from my perspective. (I think in the the renpy launcher has the ability to change the GUI theme without creating a new project.)
2. The story: In part is okay but the execution is not very interesting, this may be due to the lack of sounds or possibly due to the lack of some sprites or scenarios that represent the narration of certain parts of the story.
3. The music: I don't have any negative points about it, in fact I think it goes well in each corresponding scenario. Because is one of the strongest points that the VN has that made me continue reading the entire story.
In itself it's not a bad VN but it can improve.
Is understandable since it is your first project but it's appreciated that you have published a fragment of what will be your future game.
Keep it up and don't get discouraged, I know you can improve for the next update!
If I could define the experience I had with this VN it would be 3 words: I loved it.
The way you describe the story and the interaction with each character is very entertaining!
I would say that it is one of the few VNs that makes me feel that way, it's like I was watching an animated television series when I was a child.
I also liked the scenarios and GUI's, it seems that there has been an improvement in quality than your other VN which is worth admiring.
The only thing that could be negative would be certain transitions in the dialogues, since there are certain pauses in each part of the dialogue that makes it a little difficult to read for me (since I had to increase the speed of the text to be able to read the dialogues complete)
That would be my entire rating on this VN, it turned out excellent!
P.S. The video of the intro when you start the game made me laugh a little. I think it was because it caught me off guard 😂
Hello, thanks for stopping over here and enjoying the game!
For answer your question, during Act I (Month 1 - September) the 3 routes are being developed continuously, so in each update there will be a progress of the story of the 3 routes available at the same time, as it's in the Demo.
And during a certain point in the story, between Act II or III (Month 2, 3 - October, November) probably I take the decision of develop the story of 1 route at a time for the game (due to to the endings I have in mind).
I know the answer sounds a little vague, but I try to avoid saying any spoilers that I have in mind for the game, hehe.
Once again, thank you very much for playing and also enjoying Kaito's character.
I have many plans for him during the development of the game.
What a great game!
There are many details that I love.
Such as the art, the music and above all, the story.
Although there are some who mention that they compare it to Danganronpa.
I don't see a problem with you being inspired by it (if that were the case), keep working on the story.
I'm dying to know how you will establish the mechanics of deciding who lives or who dies.
Will it be a linear story? There will be more research mechanics?
I look forward to finding out in the next update!
Hi skull2n.
GCreative! is here.
I know it may be difficult for you to advance what your FVN has been, due to multiple factors.
But don't worry, it's completely normal for you to have that kind of discouragement.
As a user here said, balance your personal life with your life as a developer of your visual novel, follow everything at your own pace. Keep it up and I wish you success.
Little by little you will see that you will be able to improve and you will get people who support your game like me :D
