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I loved the back and forth here. There's a couple small technical items I would address, but those aside, this is overall a really enjoyable read!

Ooo, what would you recommend I fix? I definitely want to learn from this 

You know, now that I'm reading through it again, I think it was mostly stylistic choices! The one thing that did stand out to me was "Strong it may be, but surely anything will fall if he could out-think it." I would have added more actions from the character that would show his approach, rather than telling through exposition. That said, it was really just a minor item and generally I think this is a great story!