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Beloved Daughter of the Failed Lich's itch.io pageResults
| Criteria | Rank | Score* | Raw Score |
| Fun: Is the adventure fun to play in an OSR playstyle? | #24 | 4.000 | 4.000 |
| Writing: Is the adventure original and fun to read? | #31 | 4.000 | 4.000 |
| Overall | #40 | 3.792 | 3.792 |
| Usability: Is the adventure easy to use on the fly? | #62 | 3.375 | 3.375 |
Ranked from 16 ratings. Score is adjusted from raw score by the median number of ratings per game in the jam.
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Comments
Nice use of artwork, especially the skeletons sprinkled throughout. The Villager's Tale is great because it works for both the GM and the players. I've always been a fan of a narrated style of adventure introduction, and you did a good job adding secondary voices to it.
It was an interesting idea to make the surfaces in the laboratory conductive and I like that you provided mechanical rules for how to utilize that.
If I ran this I would probably cut some of the emptier rooms and combine others, to try and keep players as engaged as possible. For example, the three turbines and engine could all share a room, this would cut down on the text the GM needs to keep track of too.
I liked that you provided a few ideas for Continuing the Adventure and I thought the artifacts and monsters were quite inventive. I also liked your choice of font and colors.
Thank you for this thoughtful critique. It's useful to hear what works but also, more importantly, what doesn't! I'm looking forward to editing this adventure, cutting down the number of rooms and reducing the verbiage (my greatest weakness), when the jam is over.
Fantastic design. You nailed the OSR vibe. That control room looks like a lot of fun to run!
i appreciate the runes as a way to interact with a faction (the golem) who otherwise wouldn't be very interactable. having said that, i was a little surprised not to find any faction (or patron maybe) suggestions for Lum. we almost know more about Demelza than Lum, you know? how's she feel about wandering ghouls? and about Xng? just a few words for the gm to riff with.
that aside, the story reads well and seems pretty simple to run with the book open after one read. even so, i would have loved to have a little mini-map per page or so to better feel my way through room connections and break up walls of text. speaking of the map, a few of the more empty rooms (30 + 29, 14 + 16 + 17) seem like they could be combined without destroying the vibe so players can focus on finding Lum and control panel hijinks. "kill your darlings!" the amateur on the internet says, right? well, i only pick at nits because there aren't any big flaws. :)This is a very helpful critique, thank you! When the jam is over I'll revisit this and see if I can improve it. Much appreciated.
The control room gimmick is so good. Inspired and inspiring.
This adventure is stuffed with fun encounters. It looks like you can mostly run it room by room without reading the adventure in detail beforehand.
Wow, there is so much cool stuff in this adventure, players could spend a lot of time exploring here. I especially like the table with all the buttons and levers in the engine room. It's a clever way to reward careful experimentation with results that make sense.