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This is a really cool prototype !! I really like the dark atmosphere of the game from the moment the title screen appears. I love how there's a lot of work put into the early love of the art style. I also love how the character moves and swings around, it really reminds me a lot of classic Zelda and really captures that game feel nicely! The enemies were a nice challenge to fight against and were a lot harder than I anticipated, which created a lot of tense moments of trying to get in the right range while also backing up so i dont get hit. Having items is a neat cherry on top too, and makes me excited to see more to use!

Although I like the combat, I think it leans too much to classic Zelda styled combat and could be quicker. For example the dodge roll is really cool, but its slow and you can't act out of it afterwards, so I don't use it a lot. I think it should be a lot shorter than it is!

I also think another thing that slows the combat down is the sword swings freeze frame everytime it hits. Its tense but it can get tiring. I also am wondering if there's a way you could add variation to the last swing, for example-like maybe it could do some knockback or something. 

I also didn't really know what most of the items were for besides the potion, as the descriptions weren't really clear. But it is cool there there is a system set up so that you can have items used on the fly!

All in all I think this game has so much potential to become a really cool top down action game set in a really grim atmosphere. I'm really intrigued by the world building thats set up and I can't wait to see more of it!

also breaking pots is so satisfying and fun as always >:)

How did the story make you feel?

- You know, I like to think I handle a lot of this pandemic zoom culture a lot better than I have before. i gotten my sleep schedule fixed up, my home life is separate from my work life, and i know when to take breaks when needed. i also just gotten use to being prepared for zoom in general, such as, you know, making sure my laptop is plugged in and what not. so a lot of this game was like "is this what other people go through?"

its okay that everyone doesnt feel this sort of dread from your game. like i said, my problems with zoom is wholly separate from others, but i still understood what you were going for with the tone and the visuals.

How did the art and music affect your experience?

- it was nice and simplistic, although since its all white it feels a bit too bright...not unlike how zoom doesnt have a dark mode! so thats a good thing.

How did you feel about the choices?

- they were pretty normal choices. people tend to struggle with what to do when in a zoom call, so it makes sense that sometimes the choices presented can be mundane.

Where do you expect the story to lead?

- my inevitable demise. 

Other feedback?

- good use of renpy! would love to hear more chilling unsettling music and sound effects. maybe an actual lecture? an air conditioner providing the only sound? people typing? go wild. 

-also there really isnt a lot of zoom in this zoom game. when people are on zoom youre stuck staring at the brady bunch rows of videos and whatnot, and it can be quite draining. maybe incoporate that more

thank you so much for your kind words- def wanted to go for a very crazy story with a meta twist! twist is the important word here, of course-as it stands, the change from mystery to fantastical can certainly feel rough.

good luck with your tabletop rpg work!

yessss this project was just an excuse for "here are some songs june likes"

i love that phrase- one single meta joke reference abmoniation. thats what i strive for a lot of my stuff to be! im also glad you got a lot of the references, lol

thank you for the UI suggestion-its one of those things you dont notice if youre a developer on the game. good eye on that front!

im really glad you reccomended this post-dont tell naomi (oh whatever shes going to read this anyway) but i missed out on watching this video that she assigned us to watch. thats on me for missing that, oops.

thank you very much!

wow this made me really sad and i loooved it. and you know what, despite the bugs, it kinda worked in favor of the tone? like everything in the protags world is just breaking apart because of this divorce. it made me sad in like, a really good way that i didnt expect. it made me relaly want to fix things.

the world was really crazy to me -like, the job thing about having to be good in the eyes of god was intruging, because it feels like values of an older world, when i initially saw it as a more modern one. your writing is top notch, as always, and im really happy that this got made.

wonderful job! thanks for the sad feelings haha :'}

I really liked the changes made to this game to make it more compact. The part at the beginning explaining the world clicked with me well, and i understood the rest of the game in a snap. i actually didnt even ask for more explanation, i just "got it" right away. having Mana as a foil/interactive person to talk to was also nice as well, so that it didnt feel lonely. 

i echo kaz-there isnt a way to fail, but the resist part shows promises of somethign cool going to happen. i was actually expecting a button mashing minigame to start up at that moment! still really cool, and the ending hyped me up for even more. 

wonderful!! i hope what happens in this project influences more of your own world going forward.

this was very fun-it felt like i was going to a little party, and it was cool to compact that kind of experience into a choice narrative game. I was so upset i couldnt see gatsby! upset in like, a good way. as in i really wanted to see more of this! 

the dialogue is very fun to read, and each character is so distinct from each other that I can imagine what they look like, even without having a description. for me, i still see tobey maguire as nick, and that will never change.

wonderful job!!

very intersting idea of using a "think" option to consider what choices to make. Although in my case i thought it was a lot faster to just pick the choice and then rewind if i didnt like it. Maybe disabling the rewind button would have helped? some more incentive to use think would be nice.
i like the set up and the characters though-it felt very of the time, and the scene you chose to portray worked great thanks to the choices dictating the action

wonderful job!

hi-it was really short, (i got up to the part 

my bad, i guess the choice just didnt load up in time to continue. What a quirkly little adventure I just went on! I really like how you played around with text fonts and stuff, although it did get messing and unappealing to look at when talking to the calendar. perhaps that was the point?

waiting for stuff was something i wasnt a fan of- there isnt really good indication sometimes that i should be waiting, especially since text wasn't being typed up. still lead to some very interesting puzzles though!

wonderful and whimsical job!

very fun ride to go on and explore-i really like the descend into madness the fella goes to, especially with the faux dating novel elements in which you can kinda pick a person to be with. i chose sybil because i am not into men sorry

i wish it was a bit more descriptive though! a lot of the times when i go to kill somone it just says I picked up the knife or whatnot. Get more into detail! just not with the sex part, actually.

wonderful job of subverting expectations!

i aboslutely love it,,,everytime i play it, i always get immersed wonderfully. it makes me wish for more! i understand, though-a lot of work really went into this!
Some of the choices can feel samey, but the tone is different. this really sets up how the character acts in my head. Good work!! I think a lot of my old comments still apply, tbh
wonderful job! hope ur enjoying hyrule warriors age of calamity :]

we both love, in this zoom classroom, omnious red text :]

Very interesting story and style-i love the pacing especially with making some lines only appear one line at a time. The logical concluision system is also very fun too! I rarely failed at it, besides the one time (i thought ahab kidnapped me, and him yelling at me made me more sus of that) and i like the little twist at the end of the red text. although, i'm not sure what its supposed to be, since it kind of comes out of nowhere. is it moby dick? myself? you? ....is it hideo kojima?

wonderful job with a nice wonderful twist!

Lovely game as always- so glad to see how it went. would love to see this in a format besides twine, like a visual novel style! right now the format kinda dulls my eyes.

the choices were used to make you understand the character's thoughts, which is interesting, as it gives the player an option to make Victor their own. At the same time, some of the choices didn't feel like choices-some of them felt like 2 sentences that were fragmented apart.

I also had no idea if it ended or not, because there wasn't a choice to continue (I got the ending where you smile at Henry at the end? shoot i forgot i should have screencapped it). but i really like how there was a narrative arc in this. It certainly felt complete and had rising actions and whatnot!!

Wonderful job :]

"You grab another tray of food (can you even call it that?) "

amazing, spectacular. . . .

again, this really reminds me of the absurdist humor of jail break. I love how a lot of logic still stays within the world of arsene lupin, and it just has a lot of slapstick shenagains within. It's so much fun to wonder what choices lead to what outcomes, and I'd love to see what would happen in the peeing route alone.
Wonderful job!! take a break :]

Hello!

This was really fun to read-There was a weird thing where the perspective was in 2nd person, then goes to first person the rest of the time, but otherwise the writing was very clear and concise.

I'm a sucker for superhero like stuff, so playing as someone with powers that he's trying to hide was really fun and made me think "well, what would i do?" a lot. I just wish there were a bit more choices though. At the very least, however, the parts with choices in them felt very impactful. 

I also love the setting and worldbuilding too-the beginning was slow, but that was probably to make sure the 2nd part after that would be fast and dynamic. I love it! Wonderful job!

Very interesting style-It reminds me less of a typical choice narrative game, but more so a story book that has actions you can dictate, but still follows the overall theme of the game. I quite like it!

First, the UI scrolling kinda threw me off-It made it hard to read after making choices. That's my only nitpick though.

Second, I like how you play into the video game paradox of things/events not existing until it is done so by the player. It makes me wonder how much of the game is predetermined or not. It helps make me feel in control of the story and what happens next, even if the outcomes may be the same.

Really like the style of the writing too, and it never got too wordy for me! Wonderful job!

hello, im early (i played your game this morning, max!)

i remember you asked me if your choices provided "agency" and if i felt as though they impacted anything. after playing through this demo, i realized that many of the choices affected my relationship with Henry and Beth (i keep imagining henry cavil as henry? sorry about my type casting). so, in that case, it makes the interactions with the Creature feel very odd, as you cant show any ounce of sympathy to it. is this a commentary of how victor doesnt see the creature as a person?

regardless! the writing is still top notch, and i was very happy that i got the chance to talk it out with henry about my feelings. i dont have crushes/like guys, but i felt happy to be with henry

The protagonist is passive, but also very self-insert-able (if that makes sense.) Its kind of funny that she really thinks shes in a dream for a bit. Still, she's interesting because I can project myself onto her! (thats the word i was looking for)

assumptions about the ending, lets see...I think its going to be a wild goose chase for the mirror. In fact, i feel as though the case of "finding the mirror" isnt going to be what itll turn out to be, and wont be at all simple. and im so excited!!

the mood, again, reminds me of the Alice Returns game. although at one part the mad hatter was described and i just remembered johnny depp. otherwise, the atmosphere is a good mix of mysterious, dangerous, and whimsical.

also-the part about drowning to wonderland/your writing in general reminds me of the writing for Homestuck 2, which I quite enjoy!

Hello, Todd Howard. I would like to remind you that I am not buying Skyrim again, but I will do my best to remain civil. For the chess club, Todd.

1) The protagonist is interesting-i get the feeling after saying that i "love the portrait" That hes hiding something from the player themselves. By being nice to everyone, it sets himself up as this awful liar. by being mean to everyone, it sets him off as a narcissist, inside and out. Very good twist, as always!

2) nope-all of the choices were pretty good and seemed to consider things a player would think of at the moment

3)The pacing is good-some of the paragraphs end up being large chunks, but they read very quickly due to smart choices in wording.

im in love with the girl that nick talks to that says "hella", maam? can i be in your dms please?

the writing is really nice and feels modern. i think i was threw off a bit by nicks really simple "hi, im nick" (i read it in tobey maguires voice) but then everything else really fell into place overtime.

you do the danganronpa thing (the first game) in where you can get more information by clicking on a word within the sentence. i really like that-its like having an actual conversation.

the party was so much fun. you really did nail that feeling down of going to one and just chilling out. again i fell in love with the girl that you can talk to.

id love to see nicks character come out more in the writing. anything that references spider-man btw gets an automatic like in my book. to quote tobey maguire from spider-man "oh boy, yeah"

Amazing game! Fell in love right away. I, shamelessly at first, thought it was a clone of last years winner, but that was far from the case. 

Pretty cool, although really the only hard part was the start of it. The art style is very Jazzpunk like, but I feel like you could have gone the whole mile if you made some simple block environements beyond the skybox. 

The narrative starts of cool too, although it ends in a weird way, and it did have me expecting more. Maybe a full version one day?

Awesome game. Could use some ui tweaks such as a more clear bullet counter, but overall its very good. Wish there was more to the human player though

I think this game definietly benefits if it was tabletop, as well as more feedback about certain mechanics of the game, such as rules. You have something like that when you hover over the dice, although it could use some more work.

Ie i had a dice that said it would give my other dice the exploded effect, but there wasn't anything there that described what that effect is.

if you think about games such as Clubhouse Games 51 Worldwide classics, those are great conversions from tabletop to digital. it may have taken a lot of time to code it all in, however

Good variety of mechanics are here, although it somewhat feels like an endless runner, in where you already have to accept you're out of control.  Thats just me being nitpicky about the interpretation though.

I also agree a wider camera would be nice. also, faster speed could help too!