Amazing goblin names, I am going to steal them for a dnd game (the highest honor I can give). Changing the fonts was a decent work around for your word count but it made reading it much more taxing. Also, the gag about the demon's balls getting bashed in by goblins was funny, but felt very... out of place. (That could also just be my sense of humor, so y'know) I very much like this Battle Brother seeing a gang of goblins and just going "yeah I'll adopt them." I am now imagining a set of goblin squires for a unit of Battle Brothers, and that's always a good thing.
Good stuff! Robot druids (or robot naturalists would be more accurate I suppose) are always one of my favorites. The detail about the two just sitting there for two hours as they finished there gardening was top notch. Especially considering the "other party" in the room.
Overall I liked this one, concept was good and I liked this oddball dwarf. who is also the only dwarf with good taste in drinks. But there are a few grammatical errors here and there that really screw with the flow and I feel it could've represented the theme a bit better. But otherwise it was a nice read! I like fucking over corporations as much as any other gal and it was nice to see a story that also involved the emancipation of slave gladiators.
Ooooo, I do love a good "detached narrator" framing device! I like the set up of a previously hostile relationship between the two parties, and your pacing is 10/10. A very solid entry friend!
I liked it, was a fun read! Felt like the exclamation marks were a bit over used, but other wise no notes! (disregard the fact that I use an exclamation mark whenever possible in this comment)
I liked it, was a fun read! Felt like the exclamation marks were a bit over used, but other wise no notes! (disregard the fact that I use an exclamation mark whenever possible in this comment)
Oh man I really wanted to give you a glowing rating but I'm afraid you broke the most important rule... It had to fit on one page :pensive: It was wonderfully written and it captured how detached elves are from the rest of the universe incredibly well. Work on your formatting friend!
I found it a tad heavy handed, but I can see the bones of a wonderful story! My one piece of advice would be to commit to your descriptions more. The bit about Lyra being betrayed by one of her Lieutenants at a critical moment was great, but it was held back by its vagueness. Hope to see you again at the next jam!
I'm a transbian in highschool myself, and playing this felt amazing. I only just changed my name (Hi! I'm Joy) and I don't know how to feel about it, but playing this made me feel good about myself for the first time in a long time. It's made me realize that I don't need to wait for "something" to happen so I can start living like myself, and dressing how I want. Also this made me cry! So 10/10! Now I wanna wear a checkerboard shirt under a blouse...
