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There is a lot of character here that I really enjoyed. Though some of the accents, formatting choices, and typos got in the way of the immersion for me. The timeline is rough, I wish you had some time for some revisions.

Oh I really liked the atmosphere and the subject matter. This is the first time Ive seen the star host written like the ancient sleeping creatures that they are. Really good job

Oh I really liked the atmosphere and the subject matter. This is the first time Ive seen the star host written like the ancient sleeping creatures that they are. Really good job

I really liked the formatting, making the notes stand out from the page was a great touch. 

I really like the characters and am glad that you found the word count to bring them through. 

This had so much personality and was a delight to read

It's certainly not what i expected, but it was a delight to read.

Loved the description and the imagery. Very well written.

Really good flow and an enjoyable read. Feels like it could have been a professional propaganda excerpt, and I mean that in the best way 

Oh yeah, look at that, the lore blob does say they serve the conduit. My bad. Still trying to dive into this lore myself

This was a clean and enjoyable read. I liked getting to follow an Inquisitor and as mentioned by another comment, all the little hints about radiation. Ending from the viewpoint of a ship in orbit was stellar too. The only feedback I might have is that I wish the consequences theme was related to the main character closer, instead of him just dealing with the consequences of others. Still amazing story

I liked the themes and ideas here. Getting to see flavorful insight into the culture of the prime brothers and their short life spans is really cool. It definitely would hit harder if the word limit wasn't so harsh. Small discrepancy, that I might be misunderstanding; you said that the main character answered the conduit's call, except they are a prime brother. Im still very new to this lore but I thought battle brothers were serving the conduit and the prime brothers were fighting him. 

A wonderfully clean and nice read.