Play book
From Shadow's itch.io pageResults
| Criteria | Rank | Score* | Raw Score |
| Concepts & Originality | #2 | 4.318 | 4.318 |
| Adherence to Theme | #3 | 4.136 | 4.136 |
| Overall | #4 | 4.061 | 4.061 |
| Flow & Clarity | #9 | 3.727 | 3.727 |
Ranked from 22 ratings. Score is adjusted from raw score by the median number of ratings per game in the jam.
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Comments
pacing seemed a little fast, but one of my favorites so far, nailed the theme and the ending was amazing
Glad you enjoyed it!
So, I wrote the beginning, and then I wrote the ending, and then the middle got crammed in, so I can see what you mean with the pacing.
Still, always good to have satisfied customers!
The flow is great
Glad you liked it! I was actually worried a bit by the pacing, as I had to do a lot of trimming, but it's nice to hear it was somewhat cohesive.
Yay! I like this tale, cos it could have easily just gone for the usual cosmic horror trying to kill everything schtick, but instead did a tentacle E.T. compassion piece instead. The ending was even more awesome.
'Oh sure, I fought Ogres and helped some shadow spawn thing get home through a void gate, but that don't get my crops sowed, my gardens weeded or peace of mind secured tellin' everyone about it, do it? No it don't, so that's enough of that lark, Corrin my old salt.'
Glad you liked it!
I’ve held onto this idea for a few jams, and was tempted to use it last jam, but I’m glad I held back.
Just my luck this theme aligned perfectly with what I was looking for 👌
great setting and cute characters! I kind of wish the kid had lost an arm or something in the end to give it some punch, but that doesn't lower my score.
In some alternate universe, I can totally see myself writing the “punch” Variant of the story.
Yeah, it does take down the stakes some, I agree.
But then I would’ve had to change the ending, like, the one thing I’m happy with, lol!
SHADOW STALKERS MENTIONED :oprhype:
I really enjoyed this one, it feels like you picked the perfect scope for this format - not a grand battle between three opposing armies, just a guy trying to protect his pumpkin patch. You did a really good job with the non-verbal interactions between Conor and Gloakl and I only wish you had the space to include more.
I originally did, and then I looked and I was 400 words over.
It’s a concept I’ve held onto for the last jam or two, and I’m just happy that we had a theme that fit the story so well.
Something I love about the updated lore is not only how every faction is given a good reason to be able to fight each other, but also how many factions are given perfect reasons to team up!
Hi. I particularly enjoyed the world building and introduction of the protagonist at the start - it reminded me of the Hobbits in Hobbiton!
Great bit of humour/cuteness at the end also :)
Glad you liked the ending!
I was worried I’d have to cut it for time and space, but I persevered and had to cut more fight for it.
Worth it, in my humble opinion.
nice and different, very well executed thanks for sharing!
Thanks! Glad you enjoyed! 👍
I loved the tone of the story. It created a strong setting. The characters were fun and it felt very lighthearted with the chance that someone might be smashed to death. I am more of a grimdark future kinda guy and had to reread the lore for the shadow stalkers. Your story felt like a good extension to the current lore. I love how the shadow stalkers have a special rule Pumpkin master and you have the story taking place in a pumpkin patch.
Glad you liked it.
I’m always an AoF guy, but I like that the Writing Jams force us to stretch beyond our comfort zone and try new things with the randomized selection.
Mostly been seeing Grimdark stuff from my angle of things.
This was great! I love how you managed to figure out how to create an alliance without speaking.
One minor nitpick, I found this sentence confusing "
Others like the creature huddled together, strands of their being pulled away by the savage power of the voidgate". On careful inspection, it seems like you're using "being" as a noun, but when I first read it I thought you were missing a word (e.g. strands of their bodies being pulled away).
Great work as always.
Nice catch!
Oof, that’ll be points off for clarity, but you can’t blame a guy for trying.
Glad you enjoyed it!