The intense character focus and strong voice were the highlights of this story for me. Once you get into the action it flows smoothly and clearly, with the repeated "my own two feet" line serving as an anchor to keep the whole thing grounded.  My only complaint is the ending - I couldn't help but feel a little unsatisfied, with a fight still in progress, some space remaining in the template/word count, and the story not quite concluded. Still an excellent story, though, and a standout entry in this jam!

Great characterisation, pacing, and graphic descriptions of the enemy.  Well done!

Wonderful pacing. Love to see a pathetic wet cat of a POV character. Language is punchy through and through. Awesome job!

Really well written and paced. Kept me engaged right to the end...but what happened in the next fight?! 

I can't tell you how much I enjoyed that simple line of "Or... badly spiked". I don't know why. Got a chuckle out of me. Fun writing. I know I should've expected that he doesn't achieve his goal, given the theme of the jam, but I couldn't help rooting for Rookie anyway. Well done.

Awesome story! I love how you are able to make us connect with Rookie and feel like we understand what kind of a person he is, in such a short story. Well done!

Fun! I liked nutriloaf. I hope Rookie has good health insurance.

Fun! I liked nutriloaf. I hope Rookie has good health insurance.