Play book
Enlisted's itch.io pageResults
| Criteria | Rank | Score* | Raw Score |
| Adherence to Theme | #7 | 3.745 | 3.842 |
| Overall | #15 | 3.694 | 3.789 |
| Concepts & Originality | #16 | 3.899 | 4.000 |
| Flow & Clarity | #21 | 3.437 | 3.526 |
Ranked from 19 ratings. Score is adjusted from raw score by the median number of ratings per game in the jam.
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Comments
The way he gets conscripted was rough, reminded me of the marines in starcraft and helped differentiate the Prime Brother origins
An excellent story, with a strong emotional beat that's so often absent from these jam submissions (though definitely in keeping with your entry from Writing Jam #10). You did a great job keeping me invested in your story while exploring the humanity of the Prime Brothers. Well done!
I'm glad you enjoyed it! I think next writing jam I'll have to challenge myself more thematically, but yes I do try to give a reason to care for these characters.
I keep thinking he still got off better than the Space King boys (search You Tube if needing reference)
So the "curb your enthusiasm" theme should start playing in this story, right?
Excellent story. I really did think I had this one all figured out, but was pleasantly surprised. Great work, all around!
Really great writing. Your dialogue was enjoyable to read which is no small feat.
I can only echo what everyone else is saying, what a great piece! 5 stars from me. It's really easy to read, engaging, and there's a lot of soul and emotion to the characters. Officer Bernhardt was a standout to me, authoritative and self aware. Really wonderfully done.
I'm happy to hear you liked it! I had a lot of fun creating the demeanor of Bernhardt.
This was really cool, loved the poster too. Very thematic.
I kinda felt like I was cheating by not doing the mood board but I felt this captured the feel in it's own way. I'm glad to hear that people are picking up on that.
Oh it was definitely close enough to count, you effectively captured the mood in one image. It's actually what made me want to read it and I was quite excited when it popped up on my randoms.
Pretty sure that's top tier moodboarding ;)
This was a really good one!
Glad you enjoyed!
I REALLY liked this one.
Thanks for the feedback!