Great pacing, great characters, great prose. The demon's appearance at the end would've felt a little deus ex machina like, but you foreshadowed it well by having the shaman be uneasy about the temple in general. All in all great story.

always love reading about the jackals, and it was nice to see a take on there culture 

A fellow Jackals enthusiast :D very nicely done, I really liked this one.

I enjoyed your description of the jackals and their shamanhood training. I love how Grisha seems like a flat character but her feeling power and the god telling her that it was her fault hinted at her true nature. 

I really liked this, even as a familiar tale you put fresh life into it and the imagery of something snail-like tackling another is an unexpected juxtaposition of expectations.

I enjoyed this story a lot - it felt like you made really efficient use of your space, your characters, and your dialogue, and the end result left me wanting more.

Part of me would've liked the shaman to survive, only for him to realize what sort of deal she had struck and then have the final controntation be between these two, but no way that would've fit the word limit. Really enjoyed it as is. Made for a very good read.

Excellent example of "show, don't tell." Loved it.